I Don't Want To Be A Good Wife



Eve was in the garden, and a slithering serpent came unto her, saying that she could be wise and that her eyes would be opened. The devil said she could become like God, knowing good and evil. She could do something extraordinary and become someone of value.

Perhaps, she just thought for a moment that she would become of greater value to Adam. Perhaps she thought it was something that she needed when she already had it all. And in the moment she bit into that apple, she fell, we fell, you and I fell. Humankind fell.

She didn't become a good wife.

I had a marriage, and I was a good wife. I did what good wives did. I cooked, cleaned, and made up wonderful ideas that would further our existence. It was great. Until it wasn't, and our marriage ended in divorce. In my flesh I did all that I could to make sure that everything was perfect. You should have seen our house. It was beautiful. Until we sold it to go our separate ways.

But God had another plan.

One day, after we had remarried, I found out that I was a sinful person and that I had broken God's commandments. I had never heard that before. That because I had lied and cheated and stolen some things I was a sinner destined for hell. Unless I put my faith in Christ Jesus, which I did. And quickly.

And now, although it is unpopular, even among Christians, I refuse to make perfect with the flesh that which is already made perfect by the Spirit.

I refuse to try to be a good wife. Or a good anything for that matter. I'm not a good person. Only Jesus is good, and only He can make something good.

You see, the idea sounds so nice of being a good wife. You start with your intention, and then you develop a plan. You decide what a good wife does and then you do it. It works out great, for a while. You cook and then you clean. You act supportive. You care about his interests. So far, so good. But then it becomes a performance, a treadmill of sorts, with no end in sight. It may even take you years for this to play out.

It's the same thing with religion. Go to church, read your Bible, repeat. You grow cold if there is no relationship. You may even grow bitter and angry.

A life of tracking and trying to measure up eventually leads to a life that is lacking and that cannot reach the bar. It becomes exhausting. The goal gets ever farther and farther away. You try to impress and end up feeling empty instead. It's the same difference that happens between dieting and deciding to life a healthy lifestyle.

Would we all agree that it would be strange if our husbands ticked off the tasks on a to-do list for being a good husband? Wherein would the relationship be?

So, no, I don't want to be a good wife. My flesh is lacking, and it isn't capable.

But God is. Our happy, successful marriage that includes a miracle baby, two lunatic hounds, a radio ministry, and being gospel singers is a whole another level of crazy that works because of God. And only God. He alone gets the credit.

And so, I'm not a good wife, and it's because I don't have to be. Jesus is what makes our marriage work.

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"Only Jesus is good, and only He can make something good." Amen. We have nothing. He is everything! thanks!

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